Art & Disability parts 1 and 2

Art & Disability 1

My creative process is that of a whisp of the wind. The inspiration comes and the need to make something is so inherent, so visceral and compelling i simply must do it.

My body however is not that way. Like a mirror it demands the opposite. Pain and fatigue come at a moments notice at times, and I am now compelled to rest, not by choice. 

I find ways to make due, to adapt my work, environment and practice. I bring materials into bed when I cannot get out of it. I switch from knitting or clay to digital work when my hands and joints ache. 

Sometimes. I am able to accommodate.

The thing about chronic illness is ofcourse its chronicness. This is a continuous thing being a disabled artist. The creativity works through the art itself and the problem solving in order to make it. 

All this to say I hurt my back stretching and I'm still itching to make shit but also I'm struggling through it. Again. 

Art & Disability 2

How grateful I am to be an artist. To be, for lack of a better term, self employed. To work with the spirit of creativity rather than for a boss.

As a disabled person, I have struggled to work my entire adult life. I've had many jobs and I have burnt myself out at each and every one of them. Capitalism burnt me out. Policies and lack of health care considerations in the workplace burnt me out.

But in addition to general burn out and fatigue  my already disabled body got worse and worse. I was a "terrible employee" at times when I was only physically able to show up to half of my shifts. When I would need to leave after afew hours because I was sick. I felt for my colleagues who relied on me. But ultimately this isn't a choice. I wouldn't choose to be sick in a world I can't keep up with.

Art as a source of income comes with its own challenges, however it offers a great reprieve from the chaos of industry.